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Monday, November 05, 2007

In pitch dark I go walking in your landscape.
Broken branches trip me as I speak.
Just because you feel it doesn't mean it's there.

There's always a siren
Singing you to shipwreck.
Steer away from these rocks
We'd be a walking disaster.

Just because you feel it doesn't mean it's there.

I don't think it was the best choice for you or us, but I just wanted to drop the pretensions. I guess I didn't realize I could apply what I'd learned. Maybe it was just me, trying to convince myself that it was for the better that you didn't need to know.

I can still hear you saying "I'm horrible aren't I? I should just say yes." Well at the time I did think you were horrible. Low, traitorous, despicable. I was thinking "What, after all we've been through, you don't love me enough to even try?" But looking back, there were all these underlying problems that we always had, (And if you ask me about them the next day I probably couldn't tell you, cause that's just the way I am) and it never was as simple as saying yes. Well I just wanna say that I'm grateful for the honesty. It hurt, but I'd never want to be made a fool.

This isn't revenge or anything, I'm just tired of being someone I'm not. I'm no good but at least I don't want to be a hypocrite any longer. This is what I thought best for me and myself only. I guess I'm getting selfish. Telling the truth isn't the test of character that shows strength and virtue, it's the little white lies that I whisper to keep you happy. I'm sorry but I guess I'm out of it.


comically indifferent @ 2:35 AM